And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
