Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know
Even my vagina gasped.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party