You're so nebulous sometimes
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
