her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
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