I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
