All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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