I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
