sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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