please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
is wine microwaveable?
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
