I accidentally burped into my bong.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize