Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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