ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize