so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
