what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
My brain says no but my pants say off.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
