STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize