i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
