I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize