ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
