I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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