Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
