I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
