South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
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