3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
