Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
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