Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Randomize
