i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
