names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
