youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
