what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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