Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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