If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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