we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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