Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
