he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
