also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
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He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize