you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
you guys were way drunker than both of me
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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