I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
