there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize