all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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