She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
