I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
operation harelip BJ is a go
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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