Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
only if we run a train.
done.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
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