exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
