It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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