Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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