i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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