What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
