It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
