I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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