Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
