LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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